


Cupcake Criminal

by littlemilonugget



Category: Carmilla (Web Series)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Criminal Carmilla, Criminal vs detective, Cute, Detective Laura, F/F, Flirting, Fluff, Fluff and Humor, Happy Ending, Human/Vampire Relationship, Laura Hollis/Carmilla Karnstein Fluff, Stealing, crushes on vampires, flirty Carmilla, flustered laura, secretly soft carmilla
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-30
Updated: 2020-01-30
Packaged: 2021-02-27 12:48:04
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,939
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22477399
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/littlemilonugget/pseuds/littlemilonugget
Summary: Carmilla was a petty criminal, stealing things here and there, breaking and entering, the occasional destruction of property. Laura knew that she wasn’t evil, but she was just so annoying. To make things worse, whenever she seemed to be about to catch Carmilla, she would slip away, but not without saying some outrageously flirty lines that would make Laura turn red every time.
Relationships: Laura Hollis/Carmilla Karnstein
Comments: 13
Kudos: 53





	Cupcake Criminal

**Author's Note:**

> Hey guys this is my first fanfic. I'm not a writer so apologies if this is terrible. Hopefully enjoy.

The Monday started out just like any other day for Laura Hollis. Her alarm went off at 6:45, the Doctor Who theme song blasting through her room until she reached over to switch it off. She scrambled out of bed, grabbed a pair of jeans, a white button down and a grey jumper out of the wardrobe and stumbled over to the bathroom, tripping over her own feet several times along the way.  
After a shower that shouldn’t have been as long as it was, she grabbed some cookies out of the half open packet on the bench, picked up her pre-packed Harry Potter backpack and hurried out the door. 

Unlike many people, Laura actually liked her job. After struggling to find her passion for many years, she was offered a job as a detective working for Lafontaine, who was a friend she met at University. Lafontaine had always been interested in science, and after a few unfortunate run-ins with some extremely evil supernatural creatures during University, they had decided to start a detective agency specialising in supernatural crime.  
The agency was named the Supernatural Investigation, Law and Stability agency, or Silas for short. Silas investigated supernatural crimes, provided legal aid and rehabilitation for all supernatural creatures. Laura, however, specialised in crime.

She was particularly excited for today and she would finally be witnessing the trial, and hopefully conviction of her long time nemesis and white whale, Carmilla Karnstein. Since the moment Laura began her work at Silas, catching the frustrating vampire had been her one and only goal. Carmilla was a petty criminal, stealing things here and there, breaking and entering, the occasional destruction of property. Laura knew that she wasn’t evil, but she was just so annoying. To make things worse, whenever she seemed to be about to catch Carmilla, she would slip away, but not without saying some outrageously flirty lines that would make Laura turn red every time.  
~

For example, there was their first meeting. Laura had just been laving Paula’s, which was her favourite bakery in town and possible the world. She had a craving for her favourite cupcakes and had purchased several, none of which she planned to share. She carefully carried the plate outside and sat down at one of the small tables. Partway through her first cupcake, she noticed a leather clad, dark-haired girl who was involved in a very public, definitely not pg make-out session with a blonde haired girl against a wall. 

Laura would be lying if she said she wasn’t immediately attracted to the girl and may have been staring for a little too long, although if asked later she will insist it was because of her 'detective instinct'. As she watched, the dark-haired girl slipped her had into the pocket of the other girls jacket and slowly pulled out a wallet. Whilst still kissing the girl, she somehow flipped through the wallet with one hand, pulled out a few fifties and slipped the wallet back into the girls pocket. She pulled away from the girl, who look suitably flustered and said something to her that Laura couldn’t hear, not that she was listening in of course. The girl looked a bit upset but she walked off without saying anything. The leather wearing girl turned and leaned against the wall, counting the fifties in her hand before sliding them inside her own jacket. 

Suddenly as if she sensed someone watching her she looked around until she made eye contact with Laura. She smirked and winked before pushing off the wall and striding over to her confidently. 

“Enjoying the show sweetheart?” she said with a pleased tone to her voice. Laura glared at her. 

“You just stole money from that girl,” she said angrily and not at all flustered. The girl in front of her just continued to smirk at her in an infuriatingly sexy way. 

“Even if I did, what are you going to do about it?” Laura glared at her. 

“I’ll have you know I am a professional detective!” she said indignantly. The girl just threw her head back and laughed. Laura thought she caught a glimpse of fangs in her mouth. Of course this girl is a freaking vampire, no human is this flawless, or obnoxious. 

“You have icing on your nose,” the girl said. As Laura went to brush it off the girl quickly reached out her hand and swiped a finger across her nose, before bringing it back to her own mouth to lick it clean. Laura’s mouth dropped open in shock but she quickly caught herself and stood up.

“I’m afraid I’m going to need you to come with me,” she said as seriously as she could with the incredibly attractive, undead, flirtatious criminal looking at her like she was her next meal. A wide grin spread across the girls face.

“I’d love to come with you, sunshine, but I always do dinner first.” Laura was so shocked she couldn’t even form words. The girl laughed at her expression before continuing.

“However, I have plans for the afternoon so I must be on my way,” and with that statement she blew Laura a kiss, before rather dramatically throwing down a smoke bomb and disappearing. When the smoke cleared, Laura looked down at her plate to find her cupcakes gone and a note in their place. On the note in loopy black handwriting it said;

Thanks for the cupcakes, cupcake. Til we meet again.  
-Carmilla  
~

Then there was the flower incident. Laura had rushed to the scene after being called about a robbery at the local florists. She had rushed to the scene to find Carmilla standing in the middle of the shop, with the store owner nowhere to be found. She had a black half-mask across her face, showing only her dark eyes glittering underneath. The infuriating smirk that seemed reserved only for Laura was on full display. 

“Hey Cupcake,” the girl said flirtatiously. Laura started forward angrily but Carmilla held up a singular gloved hand which for some reason made her stop in her tracks. 

“Relax sweetheart. I just wanted to spend some time with my favourite detective.”

“Oh and you couldn’t just ask for my phone number like a normal person instead of breaking into a florist to get my attention,” Laura said sarcastically. Carmilla grinned cheekily and whipped out a giant bouquet of roses from behind her back.

“But then I wouldn’t have been able to get you these,” she said flourishing them and bowing in Laura’s direction. Laura rolled her eyes at the dramatic nature of the vampire in front of her but couldn’t help but be a little flattered. She was the only person who had ever given her flowers, even if she had stolen them.

“And you didn’t think of just buying some. You know, since this is a flower shop. Where you come to purchase flowers. Or if you really didn’t want to spend money you could have picked some. I mean I guess it’s kind of sweet that you wanted to get me flowers but I just think that there’s more ethical ways you cold have gone about it and I…” Laura stopped herself abruptly when she realised she was rambling. She turned red and looked up but Carmilla wasn’t laughing at her she was just smiling almost softly. 

“You’re too cute, cupcake,” she said quietly. Laura turned a brighter red and focused on the floor in front of her. 

“No-one’s ever got me flowers before,” she mumbled quietly. She looked up and was surprised to see Carmilla’s shocked expression. 

“It’s not a big deal,” Laura said embarrassed, "Forget I said anything." 

“Well cupcake, I think you deserve all the flowers in the world and if I could give them to you I would,” Carmilla said softly. There was a long pause. Carmilla cleared her throat awkwardly and shoved the flowers into Laura’s arms. 

“Anyway, I better get going. As much as I’d love to see what you can do with those handcuffs you’ve got there, I have things to do and people to see.” With a wink and the signature smirk, she threw another smoke bomb down and was gone before Laura could even blush. 

~

But then, last week, the unthinkable happened. After a year and a half of Carmilla committing crimes, Laura failing to stop her and a lot of shameless flirting in between, Carmilla had finally been captured. 

Unfortunately, Laura hadn’t been the one to do the actual catching, but she was still pretty pleased. Although that wasn’t to say she wouldn’t miss the antics of the sneaky vampire. And so now she was seated in the makeshift courtroom, preparing to give evidence that would put Carmilla in jail for a while. However. as she sifted through the papers in front of her, she couldn’t help but feel almost sad. Carmilla wasn’t really a bad person. True she’d committed a few crimes, but she’d never hurt anyone. When Laura was having a bad day she’d stopped and listened to her ranting and even offered semi-helpful advice. Sure, the advice was usually illegal but at least she cared enough to try. 

So maybe Laura was having doubts about convicting Carmilla. It definitely had nothing to do with the tinsy winsy crush she had developed over the past year. Suddenly she made up her mind. She turned to the detective sitting next to her and excused herself to the bathroom. Instead of heading in that direction she ran in the direction of the holding cells where Carmilla would be awaiting her trial. After convincing one of the guards that she needed to borrow the keys on official business, she reached Carmilla’s cell. Carmilla stood up, eyes wide and she slid the key into the lock and opened the door.

“Cupcake, what are you doing?” Carmilla asked, tilting her head on the side. It remined Laura a bit of a cat. 

“I was sitting in that room and looking at the evidence and I know you’re going to go to jail and I’m just confused because for once in my life it’s not a black and white situation and I know what you’ve done is wrong but you don’t deserve to be locked up. I just… I don’t think you’re a bad person. Just maybe stay out of trouble for a while okay?” she said it all in one breath as Carmilla stared at her. 

Suddenly warm lips pressed against hers and her body was pulled into a tight embrace. Once she realised what was happening, she kissed back with equal enthusiasm, her hands tangling themselves in dark hair. After a few minutes she pulled away and wrapped her arms around Carmilla’s waist. 

“I’ll find you again, cupcake, I promise. I’ll get a job and I’ll work hard and next time you see me I’ll buy you the most expensive flowers I can find. I’ll buy the whole shop even.” Laura pulled back and smiled softly. She leaned in and kissed Carmilla again slowly. When they finally pulled apart again, she looked into Carmilla’s eyes and saw nothing but honesty. A cheeky grin formed on her own face.

“What?” Carmilla asked nervously.  
“You can do whatever you want with your life and I will support you,” she said slowly, “But if you ever steal my cupcakes again I will not hesitate to lock you up for the rest of eternity.” Carmilla snorted loudly. 

“You can try cupcake… but I think I’d quite like to be punished by you.” 

And with a wink and a smirk, and another smoke bomb, Carmilla Karnstein was officially free.

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for taking the time to read. Feedback is always welcome. :)


End file.
